Cata 5 months and Joaquin 5 months

Her is my girl and my boy both at five months. They do not look that much alike to me yet. Cata is much chunkier than Joaquin was. Every ounce of milk goes straight to her cheeks- and her thighs.

 

We spent the weekend in Calistoga

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

The Twerp

The Twerp, that's what Daniel called Joaquin for the last four weeks. For a month after our five week family odyssey to visit family east, Joaquin entered a stage of defiance and tantrums that lasted a long month. He was horribly argumentative and contrary. I was sending him to his room twice before our day's first outing. On those days my saving grace is his daily three hour naps. I have to admit he was the most trying he has ever been.

I miss my sweet, happy thing that bounced on his toes and found any stick or clever word delightful. Probably the best advice I found on how to handle his trying antics was to help him return to the moment. Some of his tantrums and whining are brought on by desires that can not be met right now.

Joaquin has a new understanding of time. For example, he knows that he watches videos on Friday. Hence his constant asking "Is it Friday?" and "I like Friday." He knows Daniel is home on weekends and he still moans many mornings as Daniel leaves the house.

The tantrums are caused by desires in the future. (He's not really one for worrying about the past.) Two year-olds are generally so happy in the moment. A two year really knows how to enjoy himself. So if I can remind, distract him, into the present then the whining and tantrums for a desire that cannot be met immediately goes away.

It's advice that I should take myself. Stay in the present moment when all is good and let go of thinking of the future or the past which causes stress. No doubt Joaquin is teaching me many things.

Cata is four months

Cata is the most delightful four months. Daniel and I wished last night we could freeze time at this stage (as long as she is not waking more than once at night.) She is sweet, cooperative and draws attention like a movie star.
Daniel seems to love the attention of carrying his four month old around. Daniel walks into a restaurant holding Catalina and every woman between age two to a hundred turns her head, awws and checks them out. Yesterday we walked by the local college bar called the Jupiter. I had Joaquin's hand and Daniel had Cata in his arms. Three lovely college girls stopped mid-sentence to admire Cata. From Daniel's silly grin, I'd guess that not a regular occurrence. Cata is a head turner. She is so wonderfully cooperative while I am busy tending to Joaquin's needs for toys found, food, books read. So while Cata is a doll, Joaquin has entered at last the terrible twos and some days they are terrible.

Structure

We started Joaquin in a little preschool. The program is called La Academia. It runs Monday through Friday from 9am- 12pm. I have such mixed feelings about the program. I love that it's bilingual. I am trying to speak Spanish with him but my Spanish is far from as fluid as I would like. I think that one of the biggest gifts I could give Joaquin is to speak Spanish easily and not struggle to master the language like I have for so many years. I like that I give my undivided attention to Cata while he's at school and she is awake. Cata is easier to ignore and when she is a pest she catches my hard edge since Joaquin is my first and demands so much. Joaquin seems to enjoy the activity at the school and does not display separation anxiety when he's there, though after the first week he asks to stay home with me.

Then there's what I do not feel ready for. I do not feel ready to have his days scripted to a schedule. As it is I am taking him four days a week only. It is hard to get him dressed and out of the house. He doesn't want to go because he likes and is happiest when he is living in the present moment. Urging him to hurry up, we will be late causes anxiety and tantrums. I also miss creating the flow of our days and having outings to the library, the park. Not that we still don't stop at the park most days- it's the structure that I resist. Plus I have to drag Cata there and back.

At least I am riding us around on my bicycle. To avoid the car trips and being the shuttleMom that I dread I never become, I have been riding the 1.6 miles each way with Joaquin in his front bikeseat and Cata is in a carseat in a new bike trailer. I feel both like a champion, hard-core athlete and totally over-extended. Cata does not love the carseat and she hates speed bumps. She cries most days for some of the ride. Its a challenge to soothe her with Joaquin seated on the handlebars. At least Im no soccer-mom but I might be insane. My lovely cranky pregnant neighbor said "Can you drive them like everyone else?" from her Prius window on her way to preschool. So I will give it a month and decide whether to continue or not.

Our family summer visit

 

Adventures with four

Daniel and I must be getting more sleep for we set upon an adventurous weekend. Miraculously on Saturday, we put our two kids and a canoe along with Sylvan and Ben in Ben's aging yet awesome minivan. We drove the hour north to Healdsburg where we put our boat in the water and canoed down the lazy Russian river. The day went as smoothly as could be hoped for. I didn't get to swim because I had to hold Cata, but I did a turn at paddling. The only hitch is what we are calling the Great Rock Incident which consisted of Sylvan throwing a river rock at Joaquin's head. Joaquin cried but the incident passed and was forgotten. At one point, both boys fell asleep in the canoe and Daniel and I paddled quietly down the Russian River.

Sunday I planned a day of resting, father's day breakfast, cleanup and dinner at friends' house in San Francisco. A Facebook status posted alerted me that Sharon Jones and the Dapkings where going to play a free concert in San Francisco's lovely Stern Grove. She is a recent favorite of mine and like no other. Our little family had spent the sunny morning together eating homemade breakfast and enjoying a lazy trip to a little park. I hemmed and hawed about whether to brave the Bay Bridge, the hour drive and the parking with Cata. Daniel encouraged me to go. So Cata and I hopped into the car and set out. We arrived just before Sharon Jones was set to go on. The day was sunny and perfect and I remembered how easy it was to have a teeny infant strapped to my chest. Cata loved the music. Her eyes were wide and clear for much of the time. I was worried it was too loud and I had forgotten earplugs but I checked the noise level with my iphone decibel meter and it registered reasonable. Iphones are a most handy mother tool. I sang along to the 'baby I love you' style songs wooing my little Cata.

After the hour show, I drove to the dinner party. The party was in part a send off for one of my closest friends who is moving three hours south to San Luis Obispo. Joaquin got the thrill of taking BART with Daniel to join us. He was slightly shy so very well behaved and gobbled down a helping of eggplant parmesan topped off with blackberry ice cream.
My policy is go for the adventures while the kids are good. So we did.

Father's Day morning visit to the park. Joaquin displays his lawnmower trophy.